let this be our little secret, no one needs to know we're feeling (higher and higher and higher)

Hahahah I just got done reading the last two posts and.... yeah I ended it with Donnie. Quite a while after that incident, but yeah, we are no longer an I-tem.

The line that really kills me is "Whatever. I love him. The end."

I can't believe I was ok with that for so long. All that emotional trauma he unconciously put me through and I kinda just let it all slide. I wish I could have explained to him all the pain things like that caused me. I think the root of it all was just how I had no idea what his life was like before he met me. I had no idea what he was capable of, so I guess I just assumed the worst.

Anyway, our breakup took TWO WEEKS. Yeah, not even kidding. So, so horrible. I more or less stopped eating for a long time. Because that's what I do when I'm nervous. I even threw up once. You didn't need to know that.

But now! Now I am free! For so long we'd had everything planned out... our life, where we'd live, everything. All of that's over now and anything is possible. I am at once terrified and thrilled. It's a feeling I hope I can hold on to for the rest of my life.

Yah, so there's a new boy in town. Fast, I know. I can't for the life of me figure him out and it's really frusturating. I feel super lame even talking about it, just because....... I don't know, it's really really platonic, but he's SO COOL and he's really got his head together and we spent like almost an entire afternoon looking through Ripley's Believe It Or Not book. Which I'm really afraid bored the shit out of him. He's just so dang polite that I don't know if he'd say anything even if he was bored. Ahhhh man... But anyway, some serious potential there. I hope...

So there's thaaaat....

Waiting for my internship to start. Got like... a week and change till things get going. I'm gonna look so good though, I've got mad professional clothes up in here! WOOOOHOOO!!!! I'd never ever have thought that that idea would make me go woohooo. I think I'm realizing that you CAN indeed dress for sucsess and still maintain your identity. Exciting thoughts those.

Yep, guess it's back to regular blogging now.... yaaaaayyy.

kisses.