HOKAYY!!
Well... Spring break is pretty much le suck atm.
Dad pretty much bullied me into watching Relidulous. Biggest load of shit I ever saw. If it had been on the news, it would have been news product, like the stupid news type shows on Fox where the newscaster just kind of talks over everyone he's interviewing. Such close-minded shit. And then they interview people who are either a.) truckers, b.) complete whack-jobs or c.) very intelligent people who get their interview sliced in all the right ways, just so it will sound like the right point is being made.
And what makes me even more upset is the fact that he thinks he's trying to have a relationship with us. Like forcing us to watch something that shits all over what we believe in is going to gain him respect/love/brownie points etc.
He doesn't want to be loved. He just wants to be right.
Well he's wrong. SO FUCKING WRONG!
I wish he could see it. I wish he could put himself aside for a second and love me. Not even me, I don't care at this point (really), just love Celeste. She broke out in a rash after he started yelling. If he gave a rat's ass about her he'd be nicer about it.
WHERE IS HIS HUMAN COMPASSION THAT HE'S ALWAYS TALKING ABOUT? I'm convinced he doesn't have any.
Also, heh, I recently found out he had an affair like... a zillion years ago. He started going to church as a sort of pennance. Mum is a much bigger woman than I, as I probably would have left his sorry ass, kids and all.
I really have done far too much swearing in this blog. I'm just so angry! And of course was unable to say any of this to dad because I could kind of sense he just needed to air his thoughts... again. I'm just trying to show him I'm not against him but really he can't keep downing my beliefs all the time. I won't be trod upon.
Like mum.
I shouldn't say that.
I miss Donnie. I'm kind of worried about how much I miss him. Like I should be a little more laid back about it, but he misses me too. And that worries me. It worries me that we are both so into each other so soon. (creeping up on four months... in a month).
He feels like we're meant to be. I don't get any feelings to the contrary really, so maybe we are. I just don't know if I've seen enough sides to him to really know for sure that he's... the ONE. Uggnuggets. I hate that word and everything it stands for. And I don't know why.
I wish I knew what I'm looking for. But I don't.
And I'm all out of complaints. Good night
<3